This blog was inspired by this post where we learn how countries are loudly and proudly affirming that they will have Down syndrome eradicated, via abortion based on prenatal testing. To read about this, please see the post below.
This makes me want to rage and cry at the same time- like my heart and my feelings are so extreme and conflicted…the anger and the despair…..it is like a great storm…..partly because it brings up my own unhealedness with myself and my own prejudice I had before Connor.
Where I am at now, the person I have become…all because of my beloved son, my soulmate…….. I think about how governments and doctors push abortion….and those poor mamas who chose to abort, it is all fear based. Fear based because people with Trisomy 21 are seen as different. And then that is used against families. We are taught that people with Trisomy 21 are a BURDEN on society, on families. That siblings and families “SUFFER” because of it. That they would be better off dead, we all would, because they can’t lead ‘normal lives” and all the other bullshit they say.
We are manipulated with the lies and prejudices, and we have done a massive.. massive injustice to people with Trisomy 21.
It is all fear based. All of it. And most get ‘the diagnosis” and their first reaction is fear and despair- and what is that based on? Lies. It is all based on lies.
And we thank God when our babies pass the test and “don’t have it”. Because what else could be worse than having a baby with Down syndrome? That is what we are taught.
And it is such a lie.
And I bought into the lies. And I grieved HARD when we got the diagnosis. It was the dark night of my soul. I puked ALL NIGHT, rejecting this truth. Feeling my life was over. How did this happen??!? Nothing can be worse. Why did this happen? How could God do this to me? How could I manifest this? My life is over.
And I was right. My life was over. I died that day. My heart was broken that day. My son broke my heart that day. He crushed me. He destroyed me. Annihilated me. To be reborn. To be resurrected. To learn and experience love in a form unlike any other. Connor transformed my heart, he broke my heart OPEN. And I THANK GOD EVERY DAY for Connor and for that damn extra chromosome, as much as I also battle with it, I bless it, I bless Down syndrome. I thank God for the plan, for the destruction, for the devastation. I am blessed. I am lucky. Because this experience is part of the plan, it is my soul’s journey. And Connor is my teacher, he is my catalyst.
And every other parent of a child with Ds will tell you near the same thing.
So I think about the extermination of these souls who are here to teach us LOVE in a way unlike any other, and it hurts so, so badly…..not to mention , I think about the souls exterminated who don’t even HAVE Ds, but it is ‘thought” they do because of a test. A test.
Oh how our planet would be different if we could all experience the love of a person who has ‘a little something extra”. If we could open our hearts to something different. Something special. Something unique. For us to be brave enough to look deeply into the eyes of someone who radiates love- let that touch us, let it transform us.
But I have faith, I KNOW God will not let this happen. It is a fact, Jack. These countries who feel they are so enlightened, they can play God and brag about their numbers, and Heaven laughs…… and those of us who can find it in our hearts to get past the sadness and anger from a world that tries to tell us our children are mistakes, disposable, and should not be here…..we will find the Grace to bless these poor misguided souls. Trisomy 21 isn’t going anywhere. It is all part of the divine plan.